in person in hermosa beach
online across ca & nj

Couples therapy for relationship issues

Helping partners heal their relationship through a better understanding of each other and themselves.

in person marriage counseling hermosa beach, CA
online couples counseling in CA & NJ

BECAUSE you love each other deeply, but You can’t seem to move beyond the fighting. 

We know you want to break the cycle and get your relationship back on track.

You’re fighting more and connecting less, stuck in the cycle of loneliness and frustration that has emerged. The resentments just keep building and you haven’t found a way to truly resolve anything. You desperately want to feel heard and seen, but you just keep missing each other. 

You’re not sure how you ended up here. Things may not have always been easy, but they never used to be this hard. You’re fighting over the smallest things, every comment feels like a chance for a fight.

You know you love each other, but you’re starting to wonder if this is how it will always be. You’re feeling stuck, frustrated and afraid. Nothing you’ve tried so far has worked. 

You know it’s time to truly address these issues, but you’re not sure how to move forward. You’re ready to take a real look at the relationship, and yourself, in order to make the changes necessary to find happiness together again.

in person couples therapy in ca & nj
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YOU’RE READY TO:

  • Go beyond what is happening to understand why these patterns keep emerging, so you can finally change them

  • Feel heard, seen and understood - and know that your partner does as well

  • Gain clarity around your needs and desires

  • Rebuild the trust in your relationship

  • Create healthy boundaries while maintaining the closeness in your relationship 

  • Improve your communication and learn how to navigate conflict fairly and effectively

  • Reclaim your connection and intimacy, and bring some lightness back into your time together

how it works

Deepen your understanding and strengthen your foundation

Therapy for couples is focused on helping you learn to navigate the inherent complexities of partnership. The fact is relationships take work, but that work does not need to feel so hard. 

We come to our relationships with a lifetime of stuff. Expectations about ourselves, our partners, and about how relationships should work. And much of this is unconscious. Using trauma-informed psychodynamic and attachment therapy methods, we will uncover and unpack what each of you individually is bringing to the relationship (both strengths and challenges). This not only helps to deepen understanding and empathy, it allows you to make conscious choices about what you want your relationship to be.  

We’ll help you create a new way of being with each other. You’ll learn to more quickly identify your triggers and patterns, improve your communication, better self-regulate and support your partner through co-regulation. 

The process of therapy is itself an opportunity to be heard, seen and witnessed by your partner. And I will help you get there. Through this experience you will begin to reestablish trust and intimacy, and rebuild the connection that brought you together.

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Got questions?

  • Yes! We are affirming and welcoming of LGBTQ+ couples and have experience working with both individuals and couples from the queer community.

  • Whether you identify with polyamory, ethical non-monogomy, relationship anarchy, or something else, we are here to support you and help your relationship thrive. We have experience supporting couples who have already-defined relationship structures or those who are navigating a transition around their relationship identity.

  • You can expect my full presence in our sessions. My clients bring in whatever is on their mind, or challenges and reflections that have come up in the past week. I often encourage couples to bring in recent arguments and areas of conflict or misalignment that are occurring so I can help facilitate a more effective conversation. I can be more directive in couples therapy as my role is to identify and provide insight into your relationship dynamics and patterns. This may involve interrupting and redirecting you when necessary to improve communication and connection.

  • I do not typically give homework to my clients. I find this can set up an expectation around “failing” at incorporating the skills we are discussing in session. Learning new ways to be in your relationship takes time. However, it is often helpful to close sessions reflecting on the core issues discussed and the various skills or tools we identified to manage things differently moving forward.

  • Getting to know you and your story is an important part of the therapeutic process. During the first few sessions together we will talk through both of your histories, from childhood to your present relationship, as well as begin exploring what is bringing you into therapy now. I will then meet individually with each of you. As I work from a trauma-informed psychodynamic and attachment perspective, this context will help us connect the dots to learn how your past is impacting your present relationship.

  • In order to protect the unique therapeutic relationship, I am unable to see clients both for individual and couples therapy. If you are interested in working with me but need both individual and couples, please reach out for a consultation so we can assess what service would be best for you. I am happy to provide referrals to trusted colleagues for additional services.

  • You can reach out to me and our team by completing my online form here.

CHANGE IS POSSIBLE

And it starts with a phone call.